Most families sort Halloween candy on the living room floor. We do it the way a mid-size logistics company reviews a missed quarter. There is a TV. There is a slide deck. There is a podium. There is a skeleton, and frankly the skeleton was the most engaged person in the room.
This is the annual Weimar Halloween After Action Review. Attendance is mandatory. My husband Mike runs it. I just write it down so there is a record for the board.
Get the free Halloween Candy Dashboard
Want your own after action review without building a slide deck at 9 p.m.? Copy our free Google Sheet, type in your kids’ candy, and it builds the dashboard for you: piece counts, full-size math, total sugar and the soda-can comparison.
The meeting was not optional
The day after Halloween, the candy does not get eaten. It gets reviewed. If you came to our Halloween party house tour, you already know this house does not do things halfway. The decorations were still up. The skeleton was still employed.
Meeting notes, verbatim:
“Do I have to?”
“Yep. This is important.”
That is the whole exchange. Nobody appealed. There is no appeals process.
Household candy holdings: 158 pieces under management
First slide: holdings. Tatum, who is 9, brought home 119 pieces. Tessa, who is 4, brought home 39. That is 158 pieces of candy in one house, which is more inventory than some gas stations carry.
On the TV, Tatum’s portfolio was listed as “Tater Tot Candy Holdings.” He did not ask for a ticker symbol. He got one anyway.
The full-size conversion rule
Next, policy. The official exchange rate in this household is now:
One full-size bar equals three fun-size candies.
I want to be clear that this is now binding. It will be cited in future negotiations. It will probably come up at Easter.
Manufacturing market share
Then came the manufacturing market share slide, which breaks down which candy makers dominated the bag. A grown man said “market share” out loud to a 9-year-old and a 4-year-old, on a weekend, with a straight face. I have never been more attracted to anyone or more confused about my life choices.
During this portion of the review, a disclosure was entered into the record:
“I had more than just one Reese’s Pieces.”
Noted. The auditors will be in touch.
How much sugar was in our Halloween candy?
And then the sugar slide. This is the one where the room went quiet, mostly because I was doing the math in my head and getting a headache. The estimated totals for our 158 pieces:
- 1,457 grams of sugar
- 11,860 calories
- The sugar equivalent of 37 cans of soda
- About 58 days of a kid’s recommended added sugar limit
- Roughly 25 hours of running to burn it off
Twenty-five hours of running. I have not run for 25 hours cumulatively since high school. Nobody in this house is running it off. We are simply going to live with it, like adults.
Closing remarks
Every good meeting ends with a strong close. Ours was:
“Put your phone down… Buddy. Buddy.”
Which, honestly, is how most corporate meetings end too.
How to use the free Halloween candy dashboard
You do not need a podium. You do not need a skeleton, although I do recommend one for morale. You just need the sheet.
- Make your copy. Click the button below. Google will ask to make a copy in your own Drive. Say yes. Now it is yours and nobody can see your family’s candy numbers.
- Dump and sort. Pour each kid’s bag out and group it by type. This is the part kids actually like.
- Enter the candy. Type in each kid’s candy and how many of each they have.
- Read the dashboard. The sheet totals everything: pieces per kid, full-size conversions, estimated sugar, calories and the soda-can comparison.
- Present it, optionally. Put it on the TV. Call it an after action review. Accept no follow-up questions.
Halloween candy FAQ
How much sugar is in Halloween candy?
More than you want to know. Our 158 pieces came out to an estimated 1,457 grams of sugar, which is a little over 9 grams per piece on average. Fun-size chocolate bars and small candy packs usually land somewhere in that range, and full-size bars are several times more. Check the labels or use the dashboard sheet to estimate your own total.
How much added sugar should kids have in a day?
The American Heart Association recommends kids over 2 keep added sugar under about 25 grams a day. That is how our sugar slide got to 58 days. I am not saying you should ration candy for two months. I am saying the math exists.
How do you sort kids’ Halloween candy?
Dump each bag on its own towel or tray so nothing gets mixed between siblings. Sort by type: chocolate, fruity, lollipops, gum, and full-size bars in their own premium pile. Toss anything opened or unwrapped. Then count each pile and enter it in the sheet. Kids who will not sit through a meeting will absolutely sit through sorting.
How many fun-size candies equal a full-size bar?
In our house, three. One full-size bar equals three fun-size candies. That is the official rule from this year’s review, and it makes trading between siblings a lot less chaotic.
Is the candy dashboard sheet free?
Yes. Make a copy, type in your candy, and the dashboard fills in. No sign-up needed.
More Halloween chaos from our house
- Halloween Party House Tour 2026: Pumpkin DJ, Skeleton Bartender and a Garage Dance Room
- When Your Kid Refuses to Wear a Halloween Costume
- Thanksgiving Trivia for Families: Easy Table Games for Kids and Adults
Run your own after action review
Copy the free Halloween Candy Dashboard, enter your kids’ haul, and get the holdings, the full-size math and the sugar totals in one place. Podium sold separately. Actually, not sold at all. Find your own podium.